Dr Judith Orloff's Blog

Awaken Your Sexual Power

Judith Orloff - Tuesday, August 27, 2013

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Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's Guide to Intuitive Healing: Five Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Wellness

As an intuitive psychiatrist I help my patients and workshop participants learn how to develop their intuition to deepen their sexual lives. In my book, Guide to Intuitive Healing I devote a whole section to exploring sexual wellness. Sexual awakening means coming into your own erotic power. How each of us does this may differ. Conventional wisdom teaches you to clarify your sexual needs, then learn to communicate physically and emotionally with a partner. Of course both are essential. Sexuality is neither a marathon nor a sprint. Nor is it competitive! You must find your own sexual rhythm and style. The kind of awakening I’m describing includes the psychological and physical, but intuition offers other erotic options.

Sexuality radiates from many places: your physical body, your body’s subtle energy, inner guidance, dreams. Honestly ask yourself, Am I happy with my sexual life? What works? What doesn’t? No judgments. Only truth. Then you’ll know what you’re dealing with. You don’t have to answer to anyone but yourself. You may want to explore a complete process of rebuilding. Or perhaps you’ll embrace the good, discard the rest. Remember though with intuition, nothing is ever static.

Teaching workshops throughout the country, I see a radical shift in what many of us want for ourselves sexually. Tolerating months or years slipping by without sharing a real connection in a relationship no longer seems feasible. Couples long to relate more closely, even if they don’t know how. Awakening sexuality requires intimate expressions. Partners must talk, explore, dream, intuit, make mistakes, make amends, overcome strife by returning to the heart again and again. We’re all learning together. Your triumphs are my triumphs; they have a collective ripple effect on everyone wanting intimacy. Conscious sexuality, founded on spirituality and intuition, requires the following four building blocks.

Four Building Blocks for Conscious Sexuality from Guide to Intuitive Healing

1. The Erotic Power of Common Values

Sexual relationships become more erotic when people share basic values. It’s a balancing of forces. Resonances harmonizing. For instance, imagine you and your partner making love. If you both believe this act is sacred, your bond will strengthen, your ecstasy increase. Two people don’t have to agree on everything. Harmony is the melding of simultaneous notes in a chord. But when it comes to what counts – the merits of the heart, spirituality, a desire for passion – be on the same page with your partner, or at least striving toward it.

2. Passionate Communication

Being intuitive with a partner doesn’t mean you can always read each other’s mind. Express your preferences as positively as possible. For instance, telling your partner, “I really like it when you touch me softer here, harder there,” “Going slower feels great,” or “Please do that again.” If this is the tone between two people, tougher subjects can also be breached. A sense of appreciation of your partner and a sense of humor keep passion going. In relationships communication must stay open in all areas.

Beyond emotional communication, as you and your partner become intuitively attuned all kinds of wild subjects may come up. When making love you could see colors, feel energy shoot through your spine, experience intuitive flashes about how to bring your partner closer. This can all be very erotic. Don’t hold your experiences in or think they’re weird.

3. Making Love with Spirit

The writer Alan Watts said, “When you’re in love with someone, you see them as a divine being.” The divine is ecstatic, at times erotically so. Many spiritual belief systems fail to make this association. Typically God is portrayed as love unrelated to sexuality. I’d like to amend this; I believe we must include God in our sexual lives too. Take a simple approach. If you’ve never experienced spirit as sexy before, while making love ask, “May the divine flow through me” (a sacred, not sacrilegious request). Then stay aware of what happens physically, focusing on your erotic response. Slowly let it spread from your toes through your genitals to your head. Spirit gravitates to where love flourishes. Your body is the instrument it sensually plays.

4. Letting Go of Shame

Let’s aspire to viewing our entire bodies as luminous. For the purpose of society, we wear clothes. But underneath layers of pants, sweaters, skirts, mufflers, coats, slips, hosiery, and underwear, we are all naked. This is our natural state, though it’s not mentioned much. The words vagina and penis embarrass people. Except between lovers they’re rarely used in our vocabulary. We are a culture of shame. But sex is nothing to be ashamed of.

Seeing the beauty of the body with intuition lifts shame. Respect your particular aesthetic sensibilities, but also be ready to examine which ones are based in shame. Touch. Scents. Sounds. Positions. Techniques. No shame – instead of being so quick to erase the primal traces of sexuality, move intuitively with them. There’s no need to inhibit yourself.

Sexual awakening necessitates balancing masculine and feminine aspects. If a man feels, I must be macho, or vulnerability makes me weak, that balance teeters. Similarly, if a woman feels, I have to squash my intuition so I don’t threaten men, a kind of death is under way. Awakening is about seeing how multidimensional we are rather than sexually polarizing. It’s not that men are more powerful than women or women more powerful than men. True power comes from internalizing both qualities.



Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

Comments
paulette commented on 31-Aug-2013 07:56 PM
awaken sexual power, sex is very spiritual , i always felt that way, when i am connected to my soul and spirit i feel sexy ,beautiful, and i feel more intensity in my lovemaking. As an empath, i feel people sexual energy, which was so confusing.
thanks for the article,and for sharing your wisdom so life changing for me.
i saw the video with with you and Ram Dass ,so much beautiful energy , and you look super cute hugging him.
Betterlife commented on 26-Sep-2013 02:08 PM
WOW-Dr.O,you know a lot about lots of things. You are a gift from the GODS! I can't wait to read more,can we buy your book before 4/2014? From your biggest fan! THANKS AGAIN FOR ALL THE INFRO,THAT MAKES THIS A BETTER WORLD!

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Four Strategies to Remember & Interpret Dreams

Judith Orloff - Thursday, August 01, 2013

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This article was adapted from “Guide to Intuitive Healing” by Judith Orloff MD

At different times in my life, I am a physician, a teacher, a friend and an author, but being a dreamer is what I value the most.

Whatever I am doing, I always hear my dreams echoing in a distant underground chamber beneath my thoughts and feelings, attuned to the rhythms of my body and the very substance of the earth. They are my compass and my truth; they guide me and link me to the Divine. They call out to me in an intimate whisper, always knowing how to find me. They speak my real name.

For me, dreaming is a direct line to a place where magic abounds and nothing is without meaning. It is a pristine state of awareness, unpolluted and clear. Direct guidance for healing lies in our dreams, the natural territory of intuition. Here, time and space are non-existent and anything is possible. Like a blank, white canvas, our dream world is a spacious medium where intuition can freely express itself. We have only to listen.

You are in partnership with your dreams. Initiate an ongoing dialogue with them. It's like consulting the wisest doctor you can imagine who knows you inside out. You can ask your dreams anything. No question is trivial if it is meaningful to you. Expect answers. Some will be direct. Others may require interpretation.

Your dreams can reveal many truths about your life. They can provide extraordinary intuitive insights, and give you information that can help your health, love life and career. You'd be surprised at the straightforward advice that your dreams give, either spontaneously or on request.

Dreams can keep you well. Dreams provide answers. But first you must retrieve them. Here are my four strategies to help you remember your dreams:

  • Keep a journal and pen by your bed.
  • Write a question on a piece of paper before you go to sleep. Formalize your request. Place it on a table beside your bed or under your pillow.
  • In the morning do not wake up too fast. Stay under the covers for at least a few minutes remembering your dream. Luxuriate in a peaceful feeling between sleep and waking, what scientists call the hypnagogic state. Those initial moments provide a doorway.
  • Open your eyes. Write down your dream immediately; otherwise it will evaporate. You may recall a face, object, color, or scenario, feel an emotion. It doesn't matter if it makes perfect sense-or if you retrieve a single image or many. Record everything you remember.
  • When you're finished, refocus on the question you asked the previous night. See how your dream applies. One, two, or more impressions about the who/what/where of your solution may have surfaced. Get in the habit of recording your dreams regularly. Be assured I've never met anyone who can't be taught how to remember. Keep at it. Remember to practice. Soon it will become second nature to you!

    In addition to the practical aspects of remembering dreams, there's an intuitive level to understanding dreams. Reliable intuitive information stands out in very specific ways. Watch for these clues:

  • Statements that simply convey information
  • Neutral segments that evoke or convey no emotion
  • A detached feeling, like you're a witness watching a scene
  • A voice or person counseling you, as if you're taking dictation from an outside source
  • Conversations with people you never met before who give instructions.
  • I've found that my most dead-on intuitions either come across as compassionate or have no emotion at all. Develop a careful eye as you practice separating the content of your dreams from your reactions to it. Soon you'll be able to tell the difference between unreliable guidance and truly reliable guidance.

    Be aware that your dreams go by different rules than your waking life. Get ready for a mind shift. Physical laws no longer apply. Gravity changes. In dreams you can fly!



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

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    5 Tips to Intuitive Healing

    Judith Orloff - Tuesday, March 05, 2013

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    Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's Guide to Intuitive Healing: Five Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Wellness

    I am a psychiatrist and intuitive. My passion is combining spirituality and intuition with mainstream medicine. When patients come to see me, I listen to them with my intellect as well my intuition, a potent form of inner wisdom not mediated by the rational mind. Accessible to all, it's a still, small voice inside-an unflinching truth-teller committed to our well-being. Sometimes I experience it as a snap-shot-like flash, a gut feeling, a hunch, a physical sensation, a dream. Whatever the form, it is always a friend, keeping a steady eye on our bodies and spirits, letting us know if something is out of sync.

    As a psychiatrist I see many people with everything material they can ever want, and still they feel lost. What's missing is a palpable connection with their intuitive voice, one that will always guide them in a heartfelt direction. I believe that without this connection, it's impossible to lead a truly passionate life, based on instinct and authentic inner knowledge. I've written my book, Dr. Judith Orloff's Guide to Intuitive Healing: Five Steps to Physical, Emotional, and Sexual Wellness as a primer on how everyone can develop intuition and utilize it as a powerful tool for living. Intuition is not something I simply teach my patients. It has become a way of life for me. The magic of intuition is that it insists you live in the moment with no expectations, a continuing freshness. Intuition is our birthright, available to everyone. To access it, I've developed five steps that can be applied to any issue you'll ever confront from healing your body, to riding a roller-coaster of emotions to sexual awakening. I live by these five steps; they continue to sustain me. I suggest you give them a try. My hope is that they will bring you the joy and clarity you've been searching for.

    Step 1: Notice Your Beliefs (more)
    Your beliefs set the stage for healing. Positive attitudes stimulate growth. Negative attitudes impede it. It's important to rid yourself of counterproductive attitudes that you may not even realize you have. If you examine your beliefs, choose life-enhancing ones, you'll create optimal wellness. No organ system stands apart from your thoughts. Your beliefs program your neurochemicals. I'm not suggesting that you be Pollyannish, but that you be completely true to yourself. This will free you from unconscious negative beliefs that can sabotage your healing.

    Step 2: Be In Your Body (more)
    Your body is a complex and sensitive intuitive receptor. You must make a commitment to be in it completely to heal. Most people in Western society are conditioned to live from the neck up, ignoring the rest of their body. This stance is counter-intuitive. I'd like you to shift that perspective-to enjoy your intellect but revel in your physicality as well. Being aware of the sensuousness of your body opens intuition. Then you'll become more cognizant of early warning signs your body sends. This gives you a head-start on preventing illness, choosing healthy relationships, and avoiding detrimental situations.

    Step 3: Sense Your Body's Subtle Energy
    We are composed of flesh and blood, but also of subtle energy. Chinese Medical Practitioners call it "chi," a vital substance which penetrates the body and extends many feet beyond it. From an intuitive point of view, these vibrantly colored energy fields, whose centers are called chakras have a significant effect on our health. For that reason, it is important that we learn to sense this energy within us, recognize when it is off, and learn to correct the imbalance. Feeling energy can be very sensual, an extension of love. Learning to tap into your body's energy is healing.

    Step 4: Ask for Inner Guidance
    We each possess an intuitive voice that contains answers about our healing. Because our intellect is often so loud, this voice often gets drowned out. It's essential that we learn to access the stillness within--though meditation, quite contemplation, connecting with nature, prayer-in order to gain answers about our health. Spend a few minutes each day devoted to listening to this voice. It may appear as a gut feeling, a hunch, an image, a sound, a memory, an instant knowing-as if a light bulb suddenly switched on. Learn to trust the signals your inner wisdom sends.

    Step 5: Listen To Your Dreams (more)
    Intuition is the language of dreams. Every ninety minutes each night during the REM stage of sleep, we dream. Dreams provide answers about health, relationships, career choices, any new direction. The secret is to remember them. I suggest keeping a dream journal by your bed. Before you go to sleep, ask a dream a question. For instance, "Is this relationship healthy for me or should I move on?" The next morning, write down any dreams immediately before getting out of bed. Try repeating the question, every night for the next week until your answer comes. As you develop the habit of remembering dreams, you'll be able to benefit from this form of healing. As a physician, I have a continual sense of awe for the relationship between body and spirit. As your heart opens, so does your intuition. Your intuition will teach you how to see and how to love. It will instill in you a renewed faith to face anything.


    Listen To Your Dreams



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    Betterlife commented on 06-Mar-2013 07:13 AM
    THANKS AGAIN FOR YOUR SUGGESTIONS THAT ARE MAKING PEOPLES LIFES BETTER!
    Virginia Eko commented on 14-Mar-2013 05:16 PM
    A few years back I had a preognitive dream. I saw a friend flying in the air his arms and legs a fleying in the air. Afew months later he was killed in a car accident where he was catapultated out of the car.I was devastated. Should I warn people,can I change it? Another time I walked by a person I didnt even know, acquaince of my daughter,and told him to get to a doctor. My daughter told me a while later he was diagnosed with terminal cancer. these are just two of them Ive had other that havent happened yet! Im scarred to go out for fear Ill fill something about someone. Its scary Virginia
    Judith Standen commented on 01-Apr-2013 12:45 AM
    I have purchased Becoming an Intuitive Healer CDs and in Disc 1 Session One Q&A 9. Working in conventional HealthCare, you mention about the study from the Science Magazine about the complex choices versus simple choices. I am keen to know who did the study and when and the findings. Are you able to assist with this information?

    Thank you for your attention to this matter.
    Kindest regards
    Judith

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    How to Intuitively Make Smart Decisions

    Judith Orloff - Wednesday, February 06, 2013

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    Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "Positive Energy: 10 Extraordinary Prescriptions for Transforming Fatigue, Stress, and Fear into Vibrance, Strength, and Love ”

    As an intuitive psychiatrist I worship my high octane intuitions. I owe the blessing of becoming a physician to one. However, at twenty, when an unwavering inner voice told me I was going to medical school, it was the last thing I thought I wanted. This gut centered voice committed to your happiness, health, and survival, is, with practice, accessible to everyone. But when you deviate even a nano-fraction from your inner voice, energy wanes, whether a subtle seepage or radical bottoming out. The more ferociously faithful you are to this truth the more energized you’ll be.

    Intuition offers a direct line to your life force, and also, as I experience it, to a divine intelligence. We can’t afford to remain deaf to intuition’s messages. Its expertise is energy; its job is to know every nuance of what makes you tick. A master at reading vibes, intuition is constantly tallying: what gives positive energy, what dissipates it. Who you meet, where you go, your job, your family, current events, are all evaluated--crucial data that you can learn to interpret and apply.

    Here’s a formula from my book, Positive Energy to help you get started. First, listen to your body: there are positive and negative intuitions about relationships which highlight compatible matches. Second, act on this information, which is often the hardest part. Let me walk you through the process.

    Recognize Your Body’s Intuitions About Vibes

    A people-skill most of our parents didn’t know or teach us is intuitively reading vibes. We’ve learned to draw conclusions from surface data: how nice someone seems, looks, education, or if a situation adds up on paper. But intuition goes deeper; to make it work for you other ingredients must be considered such as what positive vibes feel like, for instance a sense of heart, compassion, and nurturance. In contrast, negative people project prickly, draining vibes that put you on guard.

    Here is a general guideline of body-based intuitions. Use this checklist at a first meeting, to troubleshoot problems if you're already involved, or to weigh “opportunities.” Also, feel free to add to it. Being an intuitive, I know that a signature energy always accompanies situations or people. Remember the Lil’ Abner jinxed cartoon character who always had a black cloud hanging over his head? Not a vibe that bodes well for auspicious outcomes. Instead, learn to gravitate towards brightness, a positive intuition your body’s responses will affirm. When tuning into vibes take a few quiet moments to go into sensing mode, not intellectual analysis. Look for these signs to determine attraction.

    Positive Intuitions About Relationships or Situations

  • a feeling of comforting familiarity or brightness; you may sense you've known the person before, as with the experience of deja-vu
  • you breathe easier, chest and shoulders are relaxed, gut is calm
  • you find yourself leaning forward, not defensively crossing your arms or edging away to keep a distance
  • your heart opens; you feel safe, peaceful, energized, expansive, or alive
  • you’re at ease with a person’s touch whether a hand shake, hug, or during intimacy.
  • Negative Intuitions About Relationships or Situations

  • a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach or increased stomach acid which may prompt an unpalatable deja-vu
  • your skin starts crawling, you're jumpy, instinctively withdraw if touched
  • shoulder muscles are in knots, chest area or throat constricts; you notice aggravated aches or pains
  • the hair on the back of your neck creepily stands on end
  • a sense of malaise, darkness, pressure, agitation, or being drained
  • Intuition helps you act from instinct, not impulse--a look before you leap wisdom that points you to positive energy. When it comes to who you love, where your work, or any important decision, the last thing you want to be is vague. Tuning in keeps you specific. Practice the next exercise to get this down.

    With Intuition Learn How to Pin Down and Act on Your Vibes

    Now you’re going to tune in, trust your body, and make choices based on the vibes you sense.

    Tune In: Choose a relationship or situation that needs clarification about whether or not to go forward. Perhaps a friendship, vacation or move. Begin with an easier target before you take on higher stakes. Run it by this section’s criteria for positive and negative intuitions--or others you find reliable. It’s helpful to make a top five list of the most killer indicators of positive attraction. For one of my patients it includes feeling energized and safe. Another must register an increased aliveness and peaceful sense. Write your top five in a journal so they don’t get hazy. See how they add up here.

    Act On Vibes: This is where we must be warriors. I know personally and from patients how much easier it is to tune into than to act on vibes. Insecurity, ego, lust, stubbornness can obscure better judgment. Sometimes it takes succumbing to them all to realize you won’t tolerate such battering again. But if you don’t have to take such a bumpy route, try these options. If the vibes feel overall positive, go for it; explore possibilities. If the vibes are mixed or you’re unsure, take a pass or at least wait. If there’s just negative, have the courage to walk away, no matter how tempting the option seems. Then observe how listening to energy in this way leads you to the juiciest opportunities.

    Now I want you to start listening. Really listening. I guarantee you’ll start making smarter choices. Why? You’ll be operating from a spot inside that’s juicy, core-felt, authentic--not from an impulse to conform or disown your strength. You won’t be seduced by what may look good, but betrays your gut. Intuition is a truth detector.




    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    Betterlife commented on 07-Feb-2013 05:45 AM
    Thank you for teaching us to live happier and more meaningful lives,you really are helping to make this a better world. I love reading your wise words and sharing your wisdom with others. I truly think of you as a friend-I can always find an answer to whats baffling me,by just going to your website and also you inspire me and others to approach life in an enthusiastic manner. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THAT YOU DO!!!!! I LOVE YOU!
    Patricia Powell commented on 07-Feb-2013 04:48 PM
    Its all true and so right on..I've been there so many times,but always thought I could change the situation,or make it work..it doesn't work that way..I'm learning that at least..so happy to hear what I already know put into words for me..I loved it..keep sharing your wonderful views and truths about life..they are so valuable to us..Thanks again, Patricia
    tropicalangel commented on 07-Feb-2013 06:27 PM
    Yes, thank you Dr. Judith for sharing your message as so many are disconnected with what their body is telling them. The more people are aware, the more they empower themselves to positively change their lives!
    rosemarie commented on 07-Feb-2013 09:19 PM
    Peace, Judith,
    Good to connect with your wisdom. I'm still struggling to be able to discern a "wide awake night" when I know something is wrong... but don't know what... like the 2004 tsunami, or the 'Benghazi attack, or the recent embassy attack. I feel programmed to pick these things up... it's the sister you met in Arizona...any advice?
    moetodete commented on 07-Feb-2013 10:40 PM
    Thank you Judith for the awesome post, it is very helpful to know all these precious tips for using unlimited potetial of our own ituition.
    Lamis Shurrab commented on 07-Feb-2013 11:11 PM
    I enjoyed listening to this video as much as I enjoyed reading two of your books - Second Sight, and Emotional Freedom so far (I plan to start the third and then forth soon after).
    When I read your words I feel like I am sitting with my personal psychiatrist who cares about me and feels with me and my issues and REALLY want to help me get over my issues.
    I just finished reading your book 'Emotional Freedom' which I couldn't put down, exercises, meditations and all. There are so many things (I can't even begin to put my finger on them) in it that resonates with my own life issues and which I have been struggling but need not struggle with them any longer or the way I was going with them. Now I know better.
    Thank you for your empathy and understanding of the true human nature and spirit.
    Bless your heart
    Brain Green commented on 08-Feb-2013 12:45 AM
    An aquaintance of mine once said to me, "You are the most intuitive person I have ever met." I experience it as a kind of knowing, without evidence. This is especially useful to me as a Hypnotherapist. From my website, I wrote, in full agreement with your experience -

    “For the artist and/or healer, experience, knowledge and skill are useful to deal with what’s known and knowable, whereas love sharpens the senses and their focus, leading to intuition, guided by inspiration to decipher the enigmas of that which defies analysis, the as yet unknown, the as yet unknowable, the unseen, the numinous and the ineffable.”

    Also,

    "Paradigm shifting creative originality results from the pursuit of inspiration via intuition; intuition being defined as the product of the organic supercomputer that represents the subconscious mind, while inspiration is the spirit mind connection to the universal creative mind, where the virtually interchangeable unchanging elements of truth and beauty exist, omni-present throughout all eternity, whether known by mankind or not."

    Best wishes, hypnohotshot.
    Tamara commented on 08-Feb-2013 03:18 AM
    I really love what you do, I just left a bussines I started in September 2012, I got very ill with panick attacks and anxiety , just the thought to go and teach Spanish to the children made me feel so ill, I left two weeks ago, and I had this voice or feeling that I should start sewing against which I did when I was I child, I am doing it now I started making bags from scratch but I love it and also staerted making sculptures in clay another passion, so now I am doing two things I really love and I am feeling so much better.
    Thank you for sharing your knowledge.

    Tamara
    Anonymous commented on 08-Feb-2013 08:03 AM
    In listening to your example about 'toxic jobs' which intuition can expose through body signals, I couldn't help but think about how much more 'toxic' effects could result when you have the stress of not having a steady income. Certainly avoiding negative and stressful situations is key to healthy living, but in today's economic climate where unemployment is huge, I would worry more about how I'm going to pay the rent, eat, etc...and thus add to my toxic state. I think it's more realistic to try to identify the what and why of the situation causing those negative vibes and then explore how they can be addressed so the negativity dissolves. Often it's our individual expectations thata set us on the wrong path rather looking inside to determine if some of the toxins are self-created because we fail to explore a satisfying solution.
    Judith Orloff commented on 08-Feb-2013 01:08 PM
    Really enjoy everyone's comments. Trust intuition deeply, passionately, in an ongoing way!
    Laurie C. commented on 09-Feb-2013 05:26 PM
    Thank you for sharing your wisdom Dr.Orloff. Your teachings really resonate with me.
    I have many stories of how listening to my intuition led me down the right path, but I need to share a story of a time I didn't listen to my intuition.Hopefully someone else can learn from my mistake.
    One night I had the urge to stop at a local convenience store that I'd never been to before.While there, I noticed that the girl behind the counter, though extremely overweight, had a very lovely face and the most gorgeous hair I'd ever seen. I had the overwhelming urge to tell her so, but being a rather shy person who doesn't say such things to strangers, I kept my thoughts to myself.
    Later that night I picked up the newspaper and saw a picture of the same girl posing with her high school debate team with an award they had just won. Noticing that the girl looked rather sad in the picture when she should have been happy, I thought to myself,"I should have told her she's beautiful." That thought stayed with me all night, as I lay in bed awake with a heavy, sick feeling in my stomach.
    The next morning I turned on the radio. The first thing I heard was that the girl I should have said something nice to had shot and killed herself just two hours after I met her because she couldn't take the constant teasing over her weight from her classmates anymore. She thought she was too ugly to go on living.
    I have no way of knowing for sure whether saying something kind to that girl would have been enough of a lift to help her keep going, but I have a feeling it would have helped. Lesson learned the hard way. I hope I never miss an opportunity to be kind to someone who needs kindness again.
    Anonymous commented on 10-Feb-2013 10:58 AM
    Many years ago I had to make a difficult medical decision, between two options. While not the easiest choice, I chose the one that made me feel at peace. It was the best choice.
    When I listen to that absolute inner calm and peace, it is the right choice.
    Lucy commented on 10-Feb-2013 01:15 PM
    I just found your videos and website and have learned alot. Thank you so much... I feel like my intuition gets me into trouble. I have always had the ability to "feel" or "see" people for who they are from the very moment I meet them. My problem is that others don't see what I see and I don't know what to with the info I have. It seems like others love the very people I know are not truthful or nice people and it singles me out and I feel alone and like I am a bad person.
    Cathy commented on 14-Feb-2013 02:27 PM
    I may be the exception to this. I tend to be introverted and any new situation I feel icky (all the signals you said to notice from your body). If I listened to my body, I would never do anything. I have had to learn to do things afraid and most of the time I find that if I had listened to my body, I would have missed out on a great experience/person/situation. I wish I did have an accurate intuition I could rely on.
    Michelle commented on 11-Nov-2013 09:57 PM
    While I whole-heartedly agree with the guidelines Judith outlines, and have been using them many years before I read the article above, there's an interesting experience I do not quite know how to characterize, and it rather bothers me still. Back in March, I had this negative and dark, dreading feeling upon adopting a beautiful male cat I named Sebastian. He had such a loving and delightful personality, and I have always been grateful for the time we had together. Unbeknownst to me and the adoption organization I got him through, I was adopting a dying cat. Four months after he came home, over $1000 later in vet bills (which I did not hesitate to spend, even though if it hurt a little), and some tears, my little angel passed on to the next world. My question is...I wonder why I felt like I had made a mistake in adopting Sebastian. While he was only with me a short time, it makes me happy to know is that I and my other cats, especially another new cat named D'Jango, were with him. I feel blessed to have been able to care for him, and am grateful for the companionship D'Jango (Sebastian's "little brother") provided. I think his decline in health was made a little more joyful because of all the love and comforts he had. Still, I cannot seem to reconcile this whole experience being a good thing, with the dark and foreboding feelings I had during the adoption. It seems negative intuition can sometimes lead to positive things I suppose. (BTW, the large vet bills were due to so many tests trying to figure out what the mystery illness was. The vets were stumped. My own research led to the neurological form of dry FIP and, consequently, Sebastian's DNA is now part of genetic studies on this disease at UC Davis.)

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    Telling the Difference Between Intuition and Fear

    Dr. Orloff - Monday, October 17, 2011

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    Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s NY Times bestseller “Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life” (Three Rivers Press, 2011)

    In "Emotional Freedom" my approach to transforming fear has two stages. First, take stock of what makes you afraid and distinguish irrational fears from legitimate intuitions. Second, take appropriate steps to heed protective fears and transform the others with courage. At times you may foresee real danger, but more frequently unproductive fears clobber you. Therefore as a general rule, train yourself to question fears tied to low self-esteem; we’re all worthy of what’s extraordinary. For example, it’s right to question the fear that you’re too emotionally damaged to love; even the severely wounded can have their hearts opened again. True intuitions will never put you down or support destructive attitudes or behavior. Here are some guidelines for distinguishing legitimate fears from irrational ones:

    How To Tell Fear From Intuition

    Signs of a Reliable Intuition

  • Conveys information neutrally, unemotionally  
  • Feels right in your gut
  • Has a compassionate, affirming tone
  • Gives crisp, clear impressions that are “seen” first, then felt
  • Conveys a detached sensation, like you’re in a theater watching a movie
  • Signs of an Irrational Fear

  • Is highly emotionally charged
  • Has cruel, demeaning, or delusional content
  • Conveys no gut-centered confirmation or on-target feeling
  • Reflects past psychological wounds
  • Diminishes centeredness and perspective
  • For comparison’s sake, I’ll share radically different examples of how I use the above criteria. One morning I got two calls from frightened patients who both claimed to be hearing voices. Truly a typical day in my office! The first came from Bill, a schizophrenic who’d been skimping on his meds. Bill’s inner “voice” kept haranguing him, insisting he was a bad person, that his food was poisoned, that his son was being raped again by the grandmotherly babysitter. Believing these “delusions” (false beliefs unsubstantiated by fact), he was absolutely unhinged. So Bill kept calling the cops, who sent a squad car out twice, but found no threat. Tolerant but tiring of this, the officers warned that if he contacted them again, they’d haul him off to a psychiatric hospital. My other patient, Jean, had been coping with despair about her brother suffering from end-stage AIDS. Jean’s inner “voice” said to immediately fly to New York to join him, though he’d recently been stable. True of authentic intuitions, it came through clear-as-a-bell, oddly matter-of-fact and followed the typical progression of being “seen first,” then felt.

    Both patients asked me, “What should I do?’ I urged Bill to take his meds and offered reassurance about his safety, a tack that had lessened his fear many times in our decade of working together. Jean, however, I supported in buying a plane ticket because her intuition felt so imminent, so right. Fortunately, she did, despite the expense and inconvenience to her job. That week her brother took a sudden turn for the worse, slipped into a coma and died within hours. Heart-breaking as witnessing his death was for Jean, she was able to be at her brother’s side in those precious last moments.  

    Try to separate unhealthy fears from intuition. Though Bill’s case was extreme, you may also have some fears that belittle you or cause you to misinterpret danger. Perhaps in a fit of anger your ex-wife called you “useless” and you believed it. This is not intuition. Nor is being frightened of having cancer whenever a brown spot appears on your skin. Also, be skeptical of long-standing fears, say of heights; these are typically not premonitions.

    If you’re en emotional empath, it can be especially tricky to ascertain which fears are authentic, helpful intuitions. Because you tend to absorb other people’s emotions, you may pick up their fear and think it’s your own. To avoid this, always ask yourself, “Is the fear mine or someone else’s?” One dependable way to find out is to distance yourself from the source. Move at least twenty feet away. If you experience relief, it’s likely you’re perceiving another’s fear. Although it’s fine to absorb courage and all positive emotions from others because they’ll strengthen you, you don’t want to absorb negativity. Move away, and keep releasing extraneous fear by exhaling it until the feeling passes.

    While some apprehensions may be empathically linked to another’s feelings or, like Jean’s, are distinct intuitive warnings, the more garden variety ones reflect ingrained negative psychological patterns. To resolve these, you must know where they come from and do what’s necessary to loosen their hold.

    Watch Dr. Orloff's Video on How to Transform Fear



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    Lori Glier commented on 20-Feb-2012 10:22 AM
    Love this book and you inspire me so, Judith! Great blog, for me my fear here is being accepted within the arts community, as for I have no background or education within the arts . Just lived experiences and have healed profoundly through the arts , and
    therapy, and meds. My intuition says to leap and bound and speak from my inner heart and soul . Not to worry about what others think and with giving my healing arts a voice I believe that will be a very powerful tool of self growth and also education for many.
    Thanks for listening! Love , light , Lori
    Farra commented on 21-Mar-2012 10:09 AM
    Thank you so much for this inspirational article Judith! Understanding the difference between fear and intuition can be the best way to boost our confidence in making the right decision. Marie Forleo also tackles this same hot issue which you can check
    on this link http://marieforleo.com/2011/08/fear-intuition-difference/
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    Teri commented on 10-Jul-2012 04:40 PM
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    and confuses me. I am able to gently center myself in peace when I am overwhelmed with emotion I don't understand knowing it has nothing to do with me. Thank you very much. Teri
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    How to Know if You're an Empath

    Dr. Orloff - Monday, July 25, 2011

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    Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s New York Times Bestseller, Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life (Three Rivers Press, 2011)

    Empaths are highly sensitive, finely tuned instruments when it comes to emotions. They feel everything, sometimes to an extreme, and are less apt to intellectualize feelings. Intuition is the filter through which they experience the world. Empaths are naturally giving, spiritually attuned, and good listeners. If you want heart, empaths have got it. Through thick and thin, they’re there for you, world-class nurturers.

    The trademark of empaths is that they know where you’re coming from. Some can do this without taking on people’s feelings. However, for better or worse, others, like myself and many of my patients, can become angst-sucking sponges. This often overrides the sublime capacity to absorb positive emotions and all that is beautiful. If empaths are around peace and love, their bodies assimilate these and flourish. Negativity, though, often feels assaultive, exhausting. Thus, they’re particularly easy marks for emotional vampires, whose fear or rage can ravage empaths. As a subconscious defense, they may gain weight as a buffer. When thin, they’re more vulnerable to negativity, a missing cause of overeating explored in my book Positive Energy. Plus, an empath’s sensitivity can be overwhelming in romantic relationships; many stay single since they haven’t learned to negotiate their special cohabitation needs with a partner.

    When empaths absorb the impact of stressful emotions, it can trigger panic attacks, depression, food, sex and drug binges, and a plethora of physical symptoms that defy traditional medical diagnosis from fatigue to agorophobia. Since I’m an empath, I want to help all my empath-patients cultivate this capacity and be comfortable with it.

    Empathy doesn’t have to make you feel too much all the time. Now that I can center myself and refrain from shouldering civilization’s discontents, empathy continues to make me freer, igniting my compassion, vitality, and sense of the miraculous. To determine whether you’re an emotional empath, take the following quiz.

    QUIZ: AM I AN EMPATH?

    Ask yourself:

  • Have I been labeled as “too emotional” or overly sensitive?
  • If a friend is distraught, do I start feeling it too?
  • Are my feelings easily hurt?
  • Am I emotionally drained by crowds, require time alone to revive?
  • Do my nerves get frayed by noise, smells, or excessive talk?
  • Do I prefer taking my own car places so that I can leave when I please?
  • Do I overeat to cope with emotional stress?
  • Am I afraid of becoming engulfed by intimate relationships?
  • If you answer “yes” to 1-3 of these questions, you’re at least part empath. Responding “yes” to more than 3 indicates that you’ve found your emotional type.

    Recognizing that you’re an empath is the first step in taking charge of your emotions instead of constantly drowning in them. Staying on top of empathy will improve your self-care and relationships.

    Emotional Action Step. How To Find Balance

    Practice these strategies to center yourself.

  • Allow quiet time to emotionally decompress. Get in the habit of taking calming mini-breaks throughout the day. Breathe in some fresh air. Stretch. Take a short walk around the office. These interludes will reduce the excessive stimulation of going non-stop.
  • Practice guerilla meditation. To counter emotional overload, act fast and meditate for a few minutes. This centers your energy so you don’t take it on from others.
  • Define and honor your empathic needs. Safeguard your sensitivities. Here’s how.
  • If someone asks too much of you, politely tell them “no.” It’s not necessary to explain why. As the saying goes, “No is a complete sentence.”
  • If your comfort level is three hours max for socializing--even if you adore the people--take your own car or have an alternate transportation plan so you’re not stranded.
  • If crowds are overwhelming, eat a high-protein meal beforehand (this grounds you) and sit in the far corner of, say, a theatre or party, not dead center.
  • If you feel nuked by perfume, nicely request that your friends refrain from wearing it around you. If you can’t avoid it, stand near a window or take frequent breaks to catch a breath of fresh air outdoors.
  • If you overeat to numb negative emotions, practice the guerilla meditation mentioned above, before you’re lured to the refrigerator, a potential vortex of temptation. As an emergency measure, keep a cushion by the fridge so you can be poised to meditate instead of binge.
  • Carve out private space at home. Then you won’t be stricken by the feeling of too much togetherness. (Chapter 8 discusses nontraditional living settings compatible with an empath’s comfort zone.)
  • Over time, I suggest adding to this list to keep yourself covered. You don’t have to reinvent the wheel each time you’re on emotional overload. With pragmatic strategies to cope, empaths can have quicker retorts, feel safer, and their talents can blossom.



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    Paul M commented on 27-Jul-2011 01:21 PM
    This is a great article, Dr. Orloff, and something that could help others.
    Judy A. Kessinger commented on 30-Jul-2011 03:47 PM
    Hi Miss Orloff, Thank You for writing Positve Energy. I have now learned by reading this book why I have felt "different", taking on the energy of others, etc. I recognize and pay attention to my own intuition and know it is not me. I plan on reading your
    other writings to get me to my best own self!! Thank You and God Bless Judy
    Midwest M.D. commented on 30-Jul-2011 07:20 PM
    Eureka!!! Amazing! Thank God that I "chanced" upon your work while searching Amazon! You may have just saved my life, and I'm not understating in the slightest. I've been told since my Medical School years in the Southwest that I'm "empathic." I thought
    it just meant that I could really connect with my patients, but other times it seemed to be observed as a drawback. Now I finally get it. Take an empathic person, put them through years of childhood abuse, dissociation, forced intellectualization, and then
    watch them try to maintain when their natural bent puts them in the healing professions! This makes more sense to me than anything I've learned in my lifetime. Thank-you. I'm now a fan for life. PS: Wanted to leave an email address, but afraid it might be
    published.
    Denise Grenhart commented on 31-Jul-2011 09:32 AM
    Ms Orloff, thank you for your explanation of an empath. How long I have wondered what is "wrong" with me! I seem to attract those people who absolutely drain my energy. People see me as the strong one, but on the inside, I am absorbing the sadness and
    chaos that is all around me. Your empath quiz was a real eye opener - I could not have described myself better if I tried! Thank you for your work!
    Leanne commented on 06-Aug-2011 07:48 AM
    This is a breath of fresh air to me. I've been trying to figure my boyfriend of 3 years out. This really sums him up and knowing about some of his past I understand how this can be relative to him. We are moving in together and he wants a separate room
    and needs his space. I pesonally am a people person and would be happy together all the time and think nothing of it. He has always said that he can't explain it and does not understand himself so doesn't expect me to. If I can understand him, I can compromise
    more. Knowing what the issue may be helps. This blog my just turn my relationship around.... Thank you.
    Ann commented on 06-Aug-2011 05:44 PM
    69yrs it has taken me to realize I am an empath- now I can understand my relationships and the events in my life, my choices - and most of all how to deal with emotions and accept myself and enjoy being me. Thank you
    Carolyn commented on 27-Oct-2011 11:40 PM
    A chance comment and a quick search led me here and I am so relieved.
    kathleen commented on 01-Nov-2011 09:20 PM
    I am so stunned after reading this, I cant stress enough how a weight has been lifted of my shoulders,six months ago i went to the doctor in tears fearing i was losing my mind as i fitted in to so many categorises including depression, anxiety, antisocial
    and over sensitive,its so strange,i have taken time of work to try and figure out what is wrong with me and by pure chance i stumble across this page!! thanks so much!!
    Anonymous commented on 14-Nov-2011 02:07 PM
    Thank you!!! I now know what's "wrong" with me!
    Anonymous commented on 04-Dec-2011 07:14 PM
    Im your average teenager. And I found out about being an empath a few weeks ago. I guess learning I was an empath and how to control it really help me understand myself better! Thank You For Having This Website! It was one of my resources!
    Anonymous commented on 08-Jan-2012 06:01 PM
    I am thirteen and apparently an empath. Your website really helped me to manage it better.A thousand thanks!
    Toni commented on 22-Feb-2012 01:07 PM
    WOW now I know why I feel like I do! My mother use to say I would cry while watching the Lassie show yet when I got older she told me I was "acting" and called me Sarah Burnheart... I knew I wasn't acting and I told my friend before I moved in I cry at
    the drop of a hat. Later we became b/f & g/f and his ex told him my crying was a way I manipulated him. Since everything goes his way I asked him how am I manipulating him? He had to admit I was right and the ex was wrong. She still tries to assinate me by
    telling him lies, I believe it is because even though she is married she still wants him (she told me that) and would do anything to get him back... Thank you Dr Orloff
    Kye Sangha commented on 14-Apr-2012 05:37 PM
    My entire life, by people who were being complete abusive creeps, I've been told that I'm "too sensitive"... To me now, that phrase means, "I'm emotionally abusing you & don't like it that you're not just sucking it up." My partner now tells me this, at
    times, and it makes me so sad, because I am starting to plan to leave...and I don't want to, but I just can't seem to learn the skills to protect myself. Maybe, for some of us, being alone is just better.
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    girl commented on 31-Jul-2012 12:55 AM
    Thank you so much for writing this. Im a 14 year old girl. I have been emotionally stressed sinse around 2nd grade. People are some how drawn to me and trust me with everything but i never knew why. But i did know that I had an ability to help people that
    I could not pass up. But Just a few years ago, i started physically hurting along with becoming stressed about other peoples problems. I seem to have a friend who emotionally drains me with his very many issues. I talked to my aunt and it turns out she is
    an Empath as well and suggested i look into it because i may be too. And based ob what i have read i am most deffinately an Empath. Thank you so much for giving this knew knowledge, hopefully I can fix my emotional stress while still being able to continue
    helping people.
    Alauna commented on 01-Aug-2012 11:59 PM
    I'm pretty sure after reading this that I'm an empath. I'm really sensitive (very!) But I force myself not to show it to fit in. And I can feel others emotions and see right through any "acts" or "ulterior motives" they do. Also, my mom is a very angry
    and psychologically unstable person. She depresses me and puts me in a foul mood unless I force myself to brush it off. Sometimes she really gets to me and tires me out. I really need to learn more about being empath. Because I really think I am one.
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    Stella commented on 10-Aug-2012 09:25 AM
    Amazing. 8/8 score. Have been going through life thinking everyone would score 8/8 in these questions, and i was the weirdo for not being able to cope as well as other people. So turns out i am the weirdo, but not because i cant cope, just because my experience
    to other people's hardships is different. Now i can do something about it. RAN to the bookstore to get your "Emotional Freedom" That title sounds like heaven on earth.
    Bernadette commented on 14-Aug-2012 11:55 PM
    I actually feel like I've found myself. Like I'm figuring out my reason for existence kind of. I feel of importance, as though I have a power. I always though I could sense emotions, I just never knew it was true. Thank you for the article, it has helped
    me tons :))
    Anonymous commented on 15-Aug-2012 10:48 AM
    Thanks so much! This was really helpful to me, and I finally kow why I eat so much when Im stressed out. Thanks again!
    paulette commented on 16-Aug-2012 06:16 PM
    i am empath and got married to a passive aggressive man, because i did not know i was picking up his emotion, i keep feeling angry for no reason , then started to be sick all the time, then i started to hear his thoughts, which i thought i was imagining.
    Now i stop, playing out his emotion, if he was angry with something at work ,he will talk about it with no emotion, like it was not a problem, and I will get visible angry, but he can't show his emotion ,so he was feeding of mine, i have stop responding like
    that. i said to God I really thought i married the right person, and he said, say the pray of St Francis.Dr Judith thank so much for your sharing if i did not see your youtube video on empath, i will not know my soul,and spirit , i came alive ,conscious .
    I love you
    Anonymous commented on 29-Aug-2012 07:29 PM
    im a 14 year old girl and am aparentaly an empath. all i can say is thank you for making this it helped me so much
    Humberto commented on 09-Sep-2012 03:17 AM
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    Natasha commented on 11-Sep-2012 09:58 AM
    I have every single one of those. I've always wondered why the sound in someones voice can bring me such sadness and make me cry. It happens with everyone I come in contact with. It's like I'm feeling their emotions and not my own. How can I stop this?
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    Wendy commented on 22-Sep-2012 12:32 PM
    I have always known I was different and felt I was even born into the wrong family. I thought there was something wrong with me. I could feel other people's feelings as if they were my own. I've known since I was a little girl, around age 10, that I was
    different, but never understood how. At 48 years old I am just learning about "being" an Empath. I'm sitting here in tears reading these comments and understanding I am not alone and that I have a unique gift that I am eager to learn more about. Thank you
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    Celeste commented on 19-Dec-2012 11:16 PM
    I know someone who describes themselves as an empath, but I didn't know what it really meant. I know what empathy means but I checked a dictionary and there was no listing for the word empath. But I couldn't leave it alone. It had to mean something, so I Googled it and ended up here, and boy, am I glad I did. Not only do I have a better understanding of this person's lifestyle, but after taking the quiz, I believe I too am an empath. My answer to all but one of the questions above was "yes." I've always known that I'm wired a bit differently than most other people, but I didn't know that it's a real condition with an actual name. Now I know why I often dread attending social events; why there are some friends I can't even talk to because I fear being all-consumed by the drama of their lives in addition to my own. Even though I'm not at all sad about it, I now have a good idea why the only way I think I could ever possibly be married again is if we could lived in separate homes. Wow. The info here has really opened my eyes to a lot of things. Thanks.
    lizzie commented on 22-Dec-2012 04:43 PM
    i have just come across this because i have been struggling for awhile with myself, i know i am different and i certainly dont feel things in a normal way. i do struggle in crowds and i come across unsocialable but im not. i feel things from other people and i pick their moods up very easily which is draining and slighty scary sometimes. i can tell instintly if there is something wrong with someone and feel the need to help but then i find it difficult to let go off.i feel slighty better knowing there are other people that have this as i do feel very alone sometimes. i am just begining to realise what and who i may be , and maybe i can put it to some use once i know how to keep myself well and safe , i will be back soon xxx thanks for the insight you will never realise what this information has done for me . i am not strange or over emotional ,, i am an empath who needs to find her way x
    Hedy commented on 25-Dec-2012 10:32 AM
    I, too am glad I came across your website. For years I have not understood why my emotions would overwhelm me. My sister is a sociopath and now I understand why we have had problems getting along with each other. She always took advantage of what she perceived as weakness. She has convin ed my mother and my three daughter's that I am not a good person. She has done this for her own benefit. I never understood why I couldn't confront her but now I see everything much more clearly. I have always withdrawn when there was confrontation that I could not deal with, and that extends to my adult children. I have allowed them to disrepect me to the point that we now do not speak.
    I now know that I can't change who I am and how I deal with uncomfortable situations, but I can learn to like myself and not blame myself for things I cannot control.
    Thank you,
    Nicole commented on 05-Feb-2013 10:04 AM
    For years as well I wondered why I was so sensitive. Why I'm able to sense things that others can't, why I don't like crowds, why I get physically sick when people talk about/when I see gruesome situations. I was extremely extatic to find this website and put a name to my being. My being an empath is a good reason why I want to be a psychologist; because I know how to heal people emotionally thanks to this gift. Sometimes it gets really uncomfortable, especially when I'm in crowds and have an overwhelming sense of everyone's emotions, and when I take on other people's problems, but I know just to spend more time to myself to calm all that down. This article really gave me a new outlook on how to control it all. It makes me feel like I have a little superpower or something haha
    terri commented on 24-Mar-2013 09:03 PM
    Thank you Judith. I answered yes to all of your questions. But I spend way too much time in my head and wonder if that is contradictory to being an empath? I guess I've lived from "the neck up" for most of my life and am now trying to reconnect with my body. I loved "second sight". Read it years ago. I've had "Intuitive healing" on my bookshelf (but haven't read it) for years and just felt drawn again to it a couple days ago. After the first few chapters I've had some interesting "instructional dreams" - telling me how to stay grounded while talking to my mother. And other interesting info has come too in single sentences in my sleep life. Thank you!
    Sahra commented on 25-Mar-2013 01:42 PM
    Thank you, I have been going through some extremely hard times and I had no reason to be an emotional wreck, but now I understand why. If I hadn't found this I don't know where I would be right now!
    Ernie commented on 21-May-2013 01:40 AM
    I am 33 and receive SS disability for diagnosed Bi-Polar disorder. Being an empath describes me to a T except for the over eating. The traits of an Indigo child also describe me. What about the lights when you close your eyes and continue to "see" with your actual eyes not your minds eye? I would appreciate any help...
    jayseduncann@gmail.com
    Anonymous commented on 25-Nov-2013 01:28 PM
    I always thought I was just grumpy in crowds and wondered why I felt the mood in the room when I walked in. When I am in a group with people or even just with one person sometimes I feel totally drained after and need quiet time to myself after to 'unwind' and re center myself. being a mother has certainly woken me up to this ability as well, I can sense my kids feelings pretty accurately and I know when my mother or husband is upset without even them telling me. This has happened around strangers as well. I thought it was me imagining things but some of my observations are dead accurate and it can be quite a pain in the rear end sometimes. I am a loner a lot of the time because crowds overwhelm me. So quiet time is essential in my daily routine and I find I can be back in tune with myself.
    Margaret commented on 26-Nov-2013 09:49 PM
    Thank you. All my life I have been labeled over emotional, but now I understand why. This explains why I can't sleep over at friends houses (I am a freshman in high-school). Hopefully now I can control this and improve my life.
    Michelle Paton commented on 15-Jan-2014 01:10 PM
    I have battled for years with a drug addiction I lived in the city for a while and then the drugs began I felt it helped me get through the day without loosing my mind just sitting in my apartment on the busiest Main Street in Melbourne Australia was too much but as things in the city go on all night I couldn't get rest either constantly awaken by the anxiety and emotions of others. A wall may stop you from seeing crowds it doesn't stop the emotions. I have one question though I have read a bit online about empaths and it fits me all too well I was put through so many medical tests for not daydreaming not paying attention at school not being normal my grandfather was the only one who accepted me for who i am and used to say to people that I dance to the beat of my own drum I wonder now if he knew I was an empath. Anyway my question can empaths feel positive feelings too as well as the negative such happiness joy a sense of excitement the feeling you get when you look forward to something ? Also when I feel anxiety is it normal for an empath to be able to workout what the anxiety is about even when in the beginning of the feeling they don't know why there anxious for example a number of times I have felt anxiety and I go through all the things going on for me that I may be anxious about when none of them feel like there the reason for my anxiety it is then that I look to those around me starting with the person I'm with after prying a little into there personal life I can usually pin point the exact reason I have had a sudden attack of anxiety I can do the same for myself if the reason is coming from me is this normal for an empath? Thanks for your fantastic article it has given me much enlightenment
    Kira commented on 23-Jun-2014 06:09 AM
    Thank you for this, I am 15years old and I can feel when my close friends/family are feeling negative and I just thought everyone could do it as well but I've found out that nobody else can and it is actually hard to wrap my head around tbh, thank you

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    Awaken the Power of Dreams: Learn to Remember and Interpret Them (VIDEO)

    Dr. Orloff - Tuesday, April 19, 2011

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    Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff’s NY Times bestseller “Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life” (Three Rivers Press, 2011)

    As a psychiatrist, I believe that dreams provide extraordinary insights into improving your health, relationships and career. I consult my dreams for all important decisions using a technique that I describe in "Emotional Freedom" and below. You'd be surprised by the invaluable advice that your dreams give, either spontaneously or on request.

    Science magazine reports that sleeping on a problem, which results in "unconscious thought," can lead to smarter decisions than over-thinking -- especially when it comes to important choices. For instance, if you're going crazy analyzing the pros and cons of a relationship, the Science study suggests that that won't get you very far; rather, it proposes that you think less and sleep on the dilemma, to give your subconscious an opportunity to solve the problem.

    I subscribe to the "sleep on it" school of decision-making, which involves drawing on the wisdom of dreams. Why do we dream? To find answers, resolve emotional conflicts and discharge negativity, as well as to stabilize our biochemistry and mood. However, to me, another interesting question is why we wake up. Native American and Aboriginal cultures revere dream-time over waking life; they base tribal law on information obtained there. The Maoris believe that when we die, we return to the dream world. Kalahari Bushmen say, "There is a dream, and it is dreaming us." So, in your own life, your dreams can contain advice that goes beyond the Annals of Internal Medicine.

    How To Remember And Interpret Your Dreams

    I recommend the following 5 strategies to remember your dreams:

  • Keep a dream journal and pen by your bed.
  • Write a question (just one!) in the journal before sleep.
  • Wake up slowly. In the morning, spend some quiet moments remembering your dream. Luxuriate in a peaceful feeling between sleep and waking, what's called the "hypnagogic state." Those initial moments provide a doorway.
  • Record your dream immediately; otherwise it will evaporate. You may recall a face, object, color, scenario, feeling or emotion. It doesn't matter if it makes perfect sense. Do not censor anything. Nothing is too "strange" or "weird."
  • See how the dream answers your question. Act on this answer and see if your life improves.
  • Try this every day for a week. Keep at it. You are programming your subconscious to remember. Soon it will become second nature to you.

    How do you interpret dreams? One key is to notice the most highly charged emotion in the dream -- for instance, anger, fear or joy. Next, ask yourself, "Where in my life am I feeling these emotions?" Then, consider how you can heal the situation or else celebrate a success. In addition, here are some common dreams and their interpretations.

    A Guide To Interpreting Common Psychological Dreams (From Emotional Freedom)

    Dreams About Your Fears, Anxieties and Insecurities:

  • You're standing buck naked in front of a group of people who are pointing at you. Meaning:You feel exposed, vulnerable and unsafe about a situation.
  • You're taking a test and panic that you don't know the answers. Meaning: You feel unprepared to meet a challenge or solve an emotional dilemma.
  • You're being chased by a horrifying pursuer. Meaning: You're trying to escape a scary person or emotion (past or present) instead of facing it.
  • You lose your wallet and are stranded without credit cards or cash. Meaning: You're afraid that you're without the emotional resources to cope with one or more aspects of your life.
  • Your teeth fall out, crack or decay. Meaning: You feel that a source of power has been taken away in your life; you can't bite back or assert your needs in a situation. Also you may experience a lack of energy or nurturing from others. (Without strong teeth, it's hard to chew food and assimilate its nutrients necessary for vitality).
  • You're wandering around lost, unable to find your way home. Meaning: You lack a sense of inner or outer direction. You don't know how to get back on track with a situation or relationship and don't feel emotionally supported.
  • Dreams Affirming Your Strengths, Emotional Achievements and Largeness of Spirit:

  • You're able to fly, a natural, joyous feeling. Meaning: You're empowered, creative and unfettered by the drag of negativity.
  • You triumph over impossible odds; for example, there is a flood, landslide or a war and you survive. Meaning: You have the courage, strength and heart to overcome difficult emotional obstacles.
  • You give birth or watch someone give birth. Meaning: You're coming into your own, thriving. It's a time of new beginnings for relationships, career or revitalizing health and emotions.
  • You feel vibrant, eating (not overeating) a delicious meal in good company. Meaning: You're nourishing yourself emotionally, and others are nourishing you.
  • You're getting married or celebrating someone else's wedding. Meaning: You're becoming whole! Your physical, emotional and spiritual sides are becoming integrated. You're ready for more of an emotional commitment to yourself, your work or another person.
  • Dreams let you pinpoint an emotional conflict so that you can solve it. For instance, if you're standing naked before a group of jeering co-workers, ask yourself, "Might I have feelings of being exposed or berated at work?" Then take steps to feel more protected in that environment. Or if, in a dream, you're wandering aimlessly, consider, "Where am I lost in my life, and how can I find my way?" Also, it's crucial to honor the messages of encouragement that dreams send. Emotional freedom comes from removing blocks as well as acknowledging your own clarity and power.



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    Grab Bags commented on 01-Dec-2013 11:55 PM
    Great Article...and Good Video....

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    How To Develop Intuition

    Dr. Orloff - Wednesday, June 16, 2010

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    (Adapted from Second Sight: An Intuitive Psychiatrist Tells Her Story and Show You How to Tap Your Own Inner Wisdom (Three Rivers Press, 2010) by Judith Orloff MD)

    In my new book, Second Sight I recount my journey to accept and embrace my intuitive abilities. Intuition isn't just something that strikes by chance. One must develop it. To do this, there are 5 essential steps that I'd like to share with you in this excerpt from the book.

    5 Steps To Develop Intuition

    Step 1: Notice Your Beliefs
    Your beliefs set the stage for healing. Positive attitudes stimulate growth. Negative attitudes impede it. It's important to rid yourself of counterproductive attitudes that you may not even realize you have. No organ system stands apart from your thoughts. Your beliefs program your neurochemicals.

    Step 2: Listen to Your Body
    Your body is a complex and sensitive intuitive receptor. Most people in Western society are conditioned to live from the neck up, ignoring the rest of their body. This stance is counter-intuitive.  Being aware of the sensuousness of your body opens intuition. Then you'll become more attuned to early warning signs your body sends.


    Step 3: Sense Your Body's Subtle Energy
    We are composed of flesh and blood, but also of subtle energy. Chinese Medical Practitioners call it "chi," a vital substance which penetrates the body and extends many feet beyond it. From an intuitive point of view, these vibrantly colored energy fields, whose centers are called chakras have a significant effect on our health. For that reason, it is important that we learn to sense this energy within us, recognize when it is off, and learn to correct the imbalance. Feeling energy can be very sensual, an extension of love. Learning to tap into your body's energy is healing.


    Step 4: Ask for Inner Guidance
    We each possess an intuitive voice that contains answers about our healing. Because our intellect is often so loud, this voice often gets drowned out. It's essential that we learn to access the stillness within--though meditation, quite contemplation, connecting with nature, prayer-in order to gain answers about our health. Spend a few minutes each day devoted to listening to this voice. It may appear as a gut feeling, a hunch, an image, a sound, a memory, an instant knowing-as if a light bulb suddenly switched on. Learn to trust the signals your inner wisdom sends.


    Step 5: Listen To Your Dreams
    Intuition is the language of dreams. Every ninety minutes each night during the REM stage of sleep, we dream. Dreams provide answers about health, relationships, career choices, any new direction. The secret is to remember them. I suggest keeping a dream journal by your bed. Before you go to sleep, ask a dream a question. For instance, "Is this relationship healthy for me or should I move on?" The next morning, write down any dreams immediately before getting out of bed. Try repeating the question, every night for the next week until your answer comes. As you develop the habit of remembering dreams, you'll be able to benefit from this form of healing. As a physician, I have a continual sense of awe for the relationship between body and spirit. As your heart opens, so does your intuition. Your intuition will teach you how to see and how to love. It will instill in you a renewed faith to face anything.



    Judith Orloff MD is a psychiatrist, intuitive healer, and NY Times bestselling author. Her latest national bestseller is The Ecstasy of Surrender: 12 Surprising Ways Letting Go Can Empower Your life. Dr. Orloff's other bestsellers are Emotional FreedomSecond SightPositive Energy, and Intuitive Healing. Dr. Orloff synthesizes the pearls of traditional medicine with cutting edge knowledge of intuition, energy, and spirituality. She passionately believes that the future of medicine involves integrating all this wisdom to achieve emotional freedom and total wellness. To learn more about the power of surrender visit www.drjudithorloff.com

    Comments
    sandy's creativethinking challenge commented on 21-Aug-2010 05:50 PM
    As technology compresses our sense of time it seems like we will have to learn to rely on our intuition with the same degree of bias we give to fact based data. When I entered the advertising world we had three weeks to get ads out. When I left we joked that we had three hours. More people, especially those credentialed, need to endorse the obvious.

    Alexis commented on 21-Jan-2012 09:18 PM
    Remarkable! Its truly remarkable paragraph, I have got much clear idea on the topic of from this piece of writing.
    Afiliados Elite commented on 08-Feb-2012 03:24 PM
    great article about Intuition but where is the rest of the article? thanks!
    Judith Orloff commented on 08-Feb-2012 03:28 PM
    Afiliados Elite, Click on the link that says "read the rest of the article here' Glad you enjoyed this offering on intuition!
    kerry commented on 10-Jul-2012 03:03 PM
    I havn't always listened to my intuition but soon realized that things didn't run very smoothly that way. Since I started listening and keeping a journal, I find it easier to get intuitive guidance through dreams, gut feelings, inner voices, etc.
    Juliet commented on 11-Jul-2012 02:32 AM
    It has taken me almost a lifetime to learn to listen to my intuition. When I was a little girl I noticed some not-so-nice things going on in my home and when I talked about it, I was told that I was imagining things or that what I saw didn't happen. This
    is how I learned to shut down my inner voice. Then as an adult I began to notice that when I didn't listen to my inner voice in times of improtant decisions, bad things happened or I made decisions that resulted in unhappy outcomes. I have now learned to trust
    that it speaks the truth all the time and to take note or take action on what it guides me to do. What a gift you are giving to others to encourage them to do the same. Bless you.

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