Watch Dr. Judith Orloff’s talk at GOOGLE about how sensitive people can thrive in an insensitive world from her national bestseller “The Empath’s Survival Guide.”
The quality of our relationships effect our health. Our relationships are governed by a give and take of energy. Some coworkers and colleagues make us more electric or at ease. Yet others suck the life right out of us. The super toxic ones can make you believe you’re flawed and unlovable. You may tiptoe around them for fear of an explosion. Some attack with put-downs, blame, or shame. They might say, “Dear, you’re looking really tired and old today,” or “You’re too sensitive.” Suddenly they make you feel as if something is wrong with you.
As a physician and energy specialist, I want to verify that energy vampires roam the world sapping our exuberance. With patients and in my workshops I’ve seen their fang marks and the carnage they’ve strewn. But most of us don’t know how to identify and cope with draining people, so we mope around as unwitting casualties, enduring a preventable fatigue.
In The Empath’s Survival Guide I discuss some types of draining people to watch for at work and ways to deal with them including the Drama Queen.
The Drama Queen
This vampire has a flair for exaggerating small incidents into off-the-chart dramas. My patient Sarah was exhausted when she hired a new employee who was always late for work. One weeks he had the flu and “almost died.” Next, his car was towed, again!. After this employee left her office Sarah felt tired and used.
How to Protect Yourself: A drama queen doesn’t get mileage out of equanimity. Stay calm. Take a few deep breaths. This will help you not get caught up in the histrionics. At work, set kind but firm limits. Say, “You must be here on time to keep your job. I’m sorry for all your mishaps, but work comes first.”