Dr Judith Orloff's Blog

3 Ways to Create Sacred Space at Work

 
Judith Orloff - Tuesday, October 10, 2017
 

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” a guidebook for empaths and all caring people who want to keep their hearts open in an often-insensitive world.


     You must be comfortable in your work environment to feel healthy and happy.

     A workplace that suits your temperament and is energetically nourishing can inspire you. It also puts you in a creative zone and boosts your energy and passion. On the other hand, a negative work environment can suck the life out of you and trigger a cascade of emotional and physical symptoms in response to stress, lack of downtime, and emotional overload. This is especially true for empaths or sensitive people who thrive in the right type of work and environment

    Since we’re typically at work for many hours, it’s crucial to feel at ease there most of the time. Three major factors play a role in your comfort level: the meaning you get from your job, the energy of the physical space, and the energy of the people around you. See where you currently stand with these factors and begin to envision how you might improve your situation.


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The Difference Between Venting and Dumping

 
Judith Orloff - Thursday, September 07, 2017
 

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” a guidebook for empaths and all caring people who want to keep their hearts open in an often-insensitive world.


    We can all get upset at times but there are healthy ways to express frustration and anger. It is important, especially for empaths and sensitive people to be aware of the difference between venting and dumping as the later can beat down one’s positivity and self worth.

    As a psychiatrist and empath myself I have a hard time tolerating loud noises. So for the sake of preservation I have a “no yelling” rule in my house. For sensitive people, a healthier way to express anger is through venting, whereas dumping is toxic and can traumatize and overwhelm us.

    For instance, if your spouse wants to vent, ask him or her to make a formal request by saying, “I have a request. I need to vent about an issue. Is that okay to do now?” This gives you some warning so you’re not hijacked. Then, it’s your choice to discuss the issue right away or later when you have adequate time and feel more centered.

    Here are some guidelines from my book, The Empath’s Survival Guide to follow when you or someone else is communicating anger.


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How to Cut an Unhealthy Bond with Someone

 
Judith Orloff - Tuesday, July 04, 2017
 

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” a guidebook for empaths and all caring people who want to keep their hearts open in an often-insensitive world.


Many of us instinctively want to take away another person’s pain, especially a loved one, but that can be unhealthy for those who soak up their negative energy.

I’ve learned to be present for my patients but not shoulder their discomfort. Since I frequently give workshops and speak in front of hundreds of people at a time, it’s essential that I ground and protect myself. Then I won’t absorb the suffering of the participants (suffering is present in all humans), which is amplified in large groups. This allows me to do the teaching I love and not get worn out by excessive stimulation.

One strategy I teach my patients and workshop participants to help them maintain healthy relationships is a cord cutting visualization technique. My patient, Terry, realized she had been absorbing her mother’s anxiety since childhood. She has a big heart and was unconsciously taking on her loved one’s emotions. However, once Terry became aware of this dynamic, I taught her to set boundaries by visualizing cutting an energetic cord between herself and her mother’s anxiety. This technique from my book, The Empath’s Survival Guide allowed Terry to create a healthy boundary and still remain a caring daughter.

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4 Reasons Why People Become Empaths: From Trauma to Genetics

 
Judith Orloff - Wednesday, June 21, 2017
 

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” a guidebook for empaths and all caring people who want to keep their hearts open in an often-insensitive world.


Why do people become empaths? Is it temperament? Genetics? Trauma? Neglectful or supportive parental upbringing? As a psychiatrist and an empath, I’ve seen that the following four main factors (which I expand upon in my book The Empath’s Survival Guide) can contribute to heightening one's sensitivities.

Reason 1. Temperament. Some babies enter the world with more sensitivity than others—an inborn temperament. You can see it when they come out of the womb. They’re much more responsive to light, smells, touch, movement, temperature, and sound. These infants seem to be empaths from the start.

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The Difference Between Empaths and Highly Sensitive People

 
Judith Orloff - Friday, June 02, 2017
 

Adapted from Dr. Judith Orloff's "The Empath's Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People,” a guidebook for empaths and all caring people who want to keep their hearts open in an often-insensitive world.


As a psychiatrist and an empath, I often get asked, “What is the difference between empaths and highly sensitive people?” In The Empath’s Survival Guide I devote a section on this important distinction.

Here are the similarities and differences. Empaths share all the traits of what Dr. Elaine Aron has called “Highly Sensitive People,” or HSPs. These include a low threshold for stimulation, the need for alone time, sensitivity to light, sound, and smell, plus an aversion to large groups. It also takes highly sensitive people longer to wind down after a busy day since their system’s ability to transition from high stimulation to being quiet is slower. Highly sensitive people are typically introverts whereas empaths can be introverts or extroverts, (though most are introverts). Empaths share a highly sensitive person’s love of nature, quiet environments, desire to help others, and a rich inner life.

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